They just don't get it!

Well it does to the people who post here... dispassionate and reasoned debate, with a good deal of humour thrown in for good measure.

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oopsorganist
Posts: 788
Joined: Mon May 16, 2005 9:55 pm
Location: Leeds

They just don't get it!

Post by oopsorganist »

Ho hum
School are "coming down" on Sunday to "do" the music for Mass.
There goes my planning on Wednesday night, did not take hours but still, it was not what I really felt like doing after a hard day down the coal mine. And the new acclamations for Advent - such as they are, but we have had to practice, suddenly abandoned.
(Don't suppose they will do the Acclamations though - sigh).

Surely to Heaven, it should befit the school in a parish to take some not of what actually happens at the parish Mass. Do they really think we do not exist until they "come down".

I will be taking Sunday off.
uh oh!
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VML
Posts: 727
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2004 12:57 am
Parish / Diocese: Clifton Diocese
Location: Glos

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by VML »

I would be hopping mad too. There are so many things wrong with what is happening, but the same happens in so many parishes. :evil:
It is difficult to be the one to assert a proper level of manners. But I think you should be straight with whoever has told you they are 'coming down' and make it clear exactly what you have already planned.
Of course the main difficulty is 'scandalising the children'. No-one wants to put them off if they have actually perepared anything. It is highly unlikely from what you say that what they have planned is a proper order of sung Mass parts.
At least afterwards make your stance to the PP, teachers and powers that be in the school and parish.
I know I would want to be there to see exactly what goes on, frustrating as it is.
There is always the option of resigning altogether, but that is unlikely if you, like me, know very well that you need the music at least as much as the parish needs you.
Keep going.....'your reward will be great in heaven.'
alan29
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Joined: Fri May 27, 2005 8:04 pm
Location: Wirral

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by alan29 »

If they want a "school mass" then why not have the dates agreed and take that Sunday off?
As it is they seem to be lacking both manners and charity.
JW
Posts: 852
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2007 8:46 am
Location: Kent

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by JW »

Presumably the school arranged this Mass weeks in advance? So why did nobody tell you? I'd suggest an email to your priest and to the school head requesting that, in future, you be informed at least a month in advance when the school is going to lead the music for Mass. Explain that you and your musicians have already put in a considerably amount of time and effort in preparing the Mass.

The school certainly would not tolerate someone from the parish coming in to give an assembly at a couple of days notice and they should observe similar courtesies with regard to parish life.
JW
promusica
Posts: 37
Joined: Wed May 23, 2012 6:11 pm
Parish / Diocese: Ashbourne Meath Ireland
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Re: They just don't get it!

Post by promusica »

As a second-level teacher also heavily involved in pastoral music, I think it is great for schools to be involved in the parish's Sunday liturgy, albeit occasionally. Experience in liturgy is vital for young people to learn - worth a thousand taught classes on the subject. Of course, common courtesy never goes astray, and it appears that you have been only given a couple of days' notice - not at all adequate. Is there another mass that they could provide music for? One without music perhaps? When our school is involved we try to set up the term's involvement a couple of months in advance, at a mass that has no music every second week so that we don't discommode people.
oopsorganist
Posts: 788
Joined: Mon May 16, 2005 9:55 pm
Location: Leeds

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by oopsorganist »

I am delighted for our primary school to join us and to help "do" the music. Only a few years back, it was something I spent a lot of time trying to move forward - lots of invitations, emails and communication - we had two teachers who joined in with the music group playing flute and violin very well. We planned together as well. So that was good.

Things are generally disorganised at the drop of a hat in our parish. It is how things work most of the time. So there is no notice or Father forgets to pass messages on to people. So I should not be surprised. Or upset really for that matter. I find planning everything quite painful and hate doing it so any relief should be welcome. Suprising that I have such strong feelings about the matter.

I think it might be that the primary school as a sizeable chunk of the parish if you like, clearly have no idea that music is planned and rehearsed in advance. That means the work I do is invisible and unvalued. Added to that will be the response of the parish ie "It was lovely, they sang so well, sang such nice hymns, we were well entertained and we did not have to move a muscle ourselves, didn't the children read lovely and so cute". Some of these children will be trained singers too, singing in a local renowned choir. No way can I match that with the resources at my disposal for Sunday Mass. The school also have a well good keyboard player who is funded centrally. That kind of hurts my feelings because I ain't that good because I spend lots of time hewing coal.

And then there is the real issue, that the teachers and children who use the school do not regularly attend our parish Mass - the teachers attend elsewhere but that is maybe an issue (Maybe they should come along occasionally) and the children just do not come. Full stop.

This is apparently the enrolment Mass for the First Holy Communion children. So in fact the Liturgy gets rail roaded by a group who might not engage with future faith - would it in fact be better if the school found out more about what happens typically at Mass in the parish and encouraged families and school staff to engage with that reality? Help is always welcome but being showed up and/or ignored is not.
uh oh!
alan29
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Joined: Fri May 27, 2005 8:04 pm
Location: Wirral

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by alan29 »

You have to wonder what the purpose of the whole exercise is.
Non-practising adults dragooning the non-practising offspring of other non-practising adults to a building they do not frequent and to a liturgy that holds no significance to them.
oopsorganist
Posts: 788
Joined: Mon May 16, 2005 9:55 pm
Location: Leeds

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by oopsorganist »

So well put.
Amen
uh oh!
promusica
Posts: 37
Joined: Wed May 23, 2012 6:11 pm
Parish / Diocese: Ashbourne Meath Ireland
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Re: They just don't get it!

Post by promusica »

You have to wonder what the purpose of the whole exercise is.
Non-practising adults dragooning the non-practising offspring of other non-practising adults to a building they do not frequent and to a liturgy that holds no significance to them.
Surely this is a tad judgemental? Perhaps at least some of the parents and their children are staunch mass-goers? And if not, is there no value on the parish providing a meaningful liturgy for those who attend less regularly? I must admit though, it can be frustrating when a cohort of people arrive in the church for a ceremony that they have absolutely no clue about, through lack of regular attendance - not just first communions, but weddings and funerals too. I have played at weddings where the ONLY people saying responses were myself and the priest (responding to himself, in the vain hope that others will join in.)
oopsorganist
Posts: 788
Joined: Mon May 16, 2005 9:55 pm
Location: Leeds

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by oopsorganist »

It is judgemental.
Maybe such days are windows of opportunity. And should be so.
However, when the school arrive, officially sanctioned as they are to kidnap any music (and probably readings etc too) from the hands of a rubbish amateur such as wot I am then that opportunity gets to be limited.
Now, if they want to do the planning and accompanying and so on every week - fine by me. I got loads to do.
And maybe the teachers attend Mass elsewhere where things and zippy and organised and have much to offer in service of the Liturgy. And so on.
I just thought it twas first Sunday of Advent and had my head around that - not around FIrst Holy Communion or around welcoming strangers through the door.
Missed opportunities - a cup of coffee afterwards, a parishioner to sponsor each child, a sharing of news, views, opinions. All fine. But planned for heaven's sake.
Ouch could have been Ooooo.
uh oh!
helen rees
Posts: 34
Joined: Sat Jul 21, 2012 11:31 am
Parish / Diocese: southwark

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by helen rees »

I sympathise with you Oops as this Sunday, our head teacher turned up with children, who read all the readings including the psalm which we had practised and it appears that this will now be a regular occurence on the first and third Sunday of each month. Great Initiative. Its just no=one told the organist and choir who only sing the psalm on the first and third Sunday. On the same weekend the newsletter carries a notice about adoration and parish talks to be held at the same time as the choir has practised for the last 30 years. I am working hard at not taking the hint that its time to give up.
Peter
Posts: 264
Joined: Fri Mar 23, 2007 6:05 pm

Re: They just don't get it!

Post by Peter »

Having on one occasion turned up at Mass with a carefully chosen set of hymns to reflect the readings only to be told that the last one would be "I watch the sunrise" (or some such) because the Mass was being offered for a deceased parishioner and it was his favourite hymn, I can sympathise with Oops' frustration, particularly as it's on a larger scale and done with far less tact and understanding than it was in my case.

Alan29's comment may look a tad judgemental but I suspect it contains more than a grain of truth. The impression sometimes comes across that parents bring their children to Mass and enrol them for First Holy Communion merely to earn enough Brownie points to get them into a Catholic school and having done so become a lot less regular in their attendance. As Promusica implies, there is value in providing liturgies that make them want to stay - but riding roughshod over someone else's hard and painstaking work is surely not the way to do it!
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Nick Baty
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Joined: Sat Jul 22, 2006 11:27 am
Parish / Diocese: Formerly Our Lady Immaculate, Everton, Liverpool
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Re: They just don't get it!

Post by Nick Baty »

Is this all about developing relationships?
I often go out for a meal or a pint with my PP and it's much easier to knock around ideas in a relaxed atmosphere. Our shared love of red wine might mean we don't always remember the details we've discussed but, over the years, we've got to know each other's thoughts rather well.
The PP often goes out for meals with the headteachers of our three primary schools. And through the PP, I've got to know these three women rather well – one in particular as we're often gettoed together in smokers' corner!
We don't all agree on everything but everyone seems to respect everyone else's gifts. The schools ask me what we're singing in the parish and mirror much of this in the schools.
Would all this happen if we didn't share the odd glass of vino?
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